Nonverbal communications is the study of communication systems that do not involve words. Everyday we are exposed to non verbal messages whether it be at the grocery store waving down the deli guy, or at school making hand signals to our friends during class, all these can easily be misinterpreted.
Just recently, my sister and I were at church and she walked in late for the service. I look over at her and she just shakes her head as if to say something was wrong. I automatically thought,” Oh great another guy problem for her” or something to that affect, however throughout service she kept glancing over at me and then to her room mate who was crying. I was utterly confused, did my sister get into a fight with her room mate? All these thoughts were racing through my head, at last after service was over, I asked her what was going on. She told me that her room mate has gotten a DUI at like 3 in the morning that day. I was shocked. This whole time I thought it was all about her but she was just shaking her head because she had to pick up her room mate from the holding cell that morning. My sister hates waking up before noon, and that affected her mood which wasn’t helpful at the time. Simple things like these signs can mean numerous things, usually when she shakes her head it’s usually about her and her situations, but not this time, it was all about her room mate and how it ruined her weekend.
Nonverbal messages can be very tricky to decipher but it helps if you know the person on a personal level and spent time together. To increase the accuracy of nonverbal messages it to be open minded and think of possibilities of what they could mean, and of course through experience by being aware of certain hand signals, such as driving in your car if a car lets you in, into their lane, you wave your hand as a sign of thanks, and the only way one will figure this out is to experience it on their own and take it once sign at a time.
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Hello msestherkim,
ReplyDeleteI agree with you on your statement about nonverbal messages and knowing a person on a personal level. Over time you get to know a persons' nonverbal cues. There are certain faces or gestures that a person can make that tell us what they are thinking. over time you learn their particular gestures and don't always need words to understand them. Within my group of friends we have code faces and gestures that we use in place of words. In example if one of us is approached by a guy that we would prefer not to speak to, instead of being rude we signal a gesture with our hands. After seeing the gesture one of us interrupts the conversation and says that we have to be somewhere. I know its not the nicest thing, but it is better than making the guy feel completely rejected.
Hi MsEstherKim! The assumptions that we make about nonverbal messages are quite interesting. Using your sister as an example as someone you know fairly well, have you ever misinterpreted other messages from her? Or, knowing your sister so well, have you ever had a nonverbal conversation with her? If so, what was it about?
ReplyDeleteWOW!
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed reading your post this week. Your post was a great example of how we can misinterpret nonverbal communication. I also thought that it was very interesting how you came up with a lot of explanations just by seeing your sister walking in late to church. You're right, we are exposed to nonverbal messages everyday and it is up to us to interpret them accurately. I also enjoyed your statement about how nonverbal messages are tricky to interpret but it makes it easier to analyze if we know the person. I also enjoyed how you stated that it's important to analyze positive gestures such as someone waiving at you because you let them in your lane. But I also believe that one has to be mindful when experiencing this in another country where waving at someone can mean something totally different or even negative. I enjoyed reading your post, great job!
blogging professor,
ReplyDeletei have had many other nonverbal messages with my sister, it's our way of saying something in front of our parents without them knowing sometimes. For instance, this one time, we were trying to get our dad to buy our mother flowers for their anniversary, however my dad had forgotten. while breakfast was on the table, I glanced at my sister to give a sign to my dad since she was seated next to him. making a sign of flowers to her and looking at my dad gave her the nudge to whisper to my dad what to do. Simple things like those where we have to say something discreetly is when we use nonverbal messages mostly. When I give speeches at church as the youth director there I always check in during my speech to her facial expressions which helps me understand if i am making sense to the students or not. If she smiles and nods then it means keep goin and if she looks confused and makes a disgusted face, i usually restate my sentence and try to make it more understandable.